Day 7: It's only been a week??

uugghhh... I feel like I've been in this pain for ages now. I can't believe it's only been a week? How long until this is over?
I can't decide if the time of this is good or bad, I mean with me being out of the country. On the plus side, I have three months to pull myself together and not have to worry about running into ex or everything around me reminding me of him. Then, when I get home, hopefully I'll be ready for a new start. BUT, on the negative end of it, I'm so far away from friends who would be helping me through this. They are helping, tremendously, through email, but it's not the same as getting to have ice cream and chick flick nights with them. Plus, when I get home, I think life is going to be drastically different. I'll be right where I was when I left (in life) while everyone else has moved one. Roomie will be a wife and living with her husband, not me anymore. Friend will be preggers and living in Florida. Other friend will be an effing Doctor and contrary to what she claims, probably be living in Minnesota. I wouldn't be surprised if Sister was engaged by then too. OH, and other Friend, probably going to be engaged too. Awesome. That will all be super fun to come home to. I know that I should quite my bitching and be happy that I've had this experience that I'm having, but I can't help but be envious of everyone else and their life momentum.

Anyway, I got sidetracked.
Today, I contacted you. It started out great. I was determined to prove I could have a normal "Hey, how's it going?" conversation with you without turning it serious and scaring you away with my over-analyzing. Uh, I failed. Geez. I was all ready to go and just say goodbye but then it all projectile vomited out of fingers...again. At least you answered one of my questions and 2 of the things I've been focusing on and letting bother me were put to rest. Even though I was irritated with myself, I'm content with the outcome of the conversation, so thank you for that.

And that was Day 7- why do I try to hurt myself more??