I'm flipping the fuck out!! I don't know what my deal is. I keep doing and saying things that are having a negative affect on others. Unintentionally of course. I tried to be honest with a friend about my uneasiness with returning home and somehow that turned into me insulting her life...what?! I de-friended ex on facebook and now he's MIA. Granted it was just yesterday but still. He disappeared from gmail just after and hasn't been back since. Plus, I emailed him to make sure he knew it was something I needed to do for me, not about him, and haven't heard back. Again, that was just this morning so I probably need to calm the hell down. I'm freaking out about so many different things and all I want to do is call and cry to him about it. I came this close *holds fingers close together* to skyping him to see if he's upset with me and cry about my woes. I decided to blog instead. Thank Goodness! Can you imagine? I would have called, all kinds of a mess, he would have been breezy and acted like nothing was wrong and he just hadn't had a chance to reply yet (whether true or not,) and I would have been left lookin' the emotional fool...AGAIN!
Stop it *insert real name*! You are fine. Your return home will be fine. Ex doesn't care if you are upset. You don't care that he doesn't care. You will get a job within a week of returning home. You will meet a kind, funny, handsome man on the plane who happens to live in *insert city where I live* and will fall madly in love. Oh, I went one too far didn't I? Ah well, my pep talk helped a bit I suppose. Okay, maybe now I can sleep.
And that was Day 86: Batshit crazy lady here
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